This is a website for the disinherited. I'm one of two adult children my dad forgot/overlooked/trusted his girlfriend to take care of (we struggle to figure out which) when making his Will, and we're left in shock, confusion and a lot of emotional hurt.
In trying to make sense of what happened, I took to the internet and social media and a few things struck me. Lots of people seem to have gone through this horrible experience of being 'accidentally' disinherited - all unique stories but with a common thread. There's a lot of advice on how to disinherit your loved ones but almost nothing on how to make sure your wishes are carried out if you (like most people) DON'T intend that. There's a lot of helpful stuff about how, if you've been disinherited, it's probably your fault and you should just get over it. Yes, even from so-called psychologists.
If you're reading this, you may know first hand how devastating it can be and it's really not just about the money... it makes you question everything you thought was good about your relationship with your mother or father, it hits at your sense of self-worth, it causes anguish with beneficiaries who you thought you knew and trusted. And in so many cases you're left with an injustice that can't be righted because the law sees the deceased person's expressed 'wishes' as sacrosanct, no matter what the evidence to the contrary.
You can read my story here. I encourage you to tell yours. I want this website to be a resource for some catharsis, a haven safe from those crass self-satisfied judgments and an ideas forum for trying to change something. If you know your loved ones wishes weren't carried out, isn't that an injustice that's crying out for something to change?
I was disinherited - on purpose - by my mother and her husband. I don't care about their money. I didn't even know they had any until recently. What gets me is that my mother hated me so much as to have me intentionally disinherited. And then lie to me about it. I took three weeks out of my life and spent thousands of dollars to get her and her husband into an ALF. I continue to go out of my way to help my mother, spending a few hours a week on stuff for her. I won't contest their will/trust. My brother can have the money. I agree that it's insulting that people assume you've been disinherited because you were a bad child to your parents or your're upset because of sour grapes or greed.
ReplyDeleteApologies for not responding earlier. I sort of back-burner this due to 2020 events. I am sorry for your experience. We, who go through this, know all too well the experience, truth and how common it is. We can hopefully find some respite with a shared experience.
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